Jesus Loves China

Globalism. The dreaded evil! Such a terrible thing—it means the end times are close right?

They said that during the First World War too. And you can be sure they said it during the Second WW! Why is our time special? Why is the end now? The Israelites thought it was the end, the Messiah must come, over and over. They didn’t ask for Moses, they groaned for their Messiah. They didn’t get Him for quite a long time after that... Yeah, our times are evil. There is the murder of innocents, there is exploitation, there is inequality everywhere, and sex trafficking in sickening numbers. And the earth is being poisoned. These are indeed evil times.

Where are the Christians? Why is the only stand we seem to take outside a Chick-Fil-A? Nothing wrong with taking a stand in front of businesses we support. But is that so special, when there is no outrage over all the “Gentlemen’s” clubs? They have absolutely nothing to do with gentlemen, because a true gentleman would never be in there unless it was to bust the place to the ground. Where are our men? Where are our women? Why are we not moving to action? Why do we only write words on the Internet and stand around wagging our heads at “something needs to be done!” speeches? (Yes, I’m writing this on the Internet, clearly I’m not just talking to others.)

I often hear that Globalism is a great evil, that with it the Mark of the Beast will come. That the United Nations will one day take control of every country. I just have to wonder... Why did the UN come into existence in the first place? Peace and order, right? Supposedly. But I wonder if Christians had been unbiasedly helping the world as we ought, would the world have seen a need for the UN? What if the body of Christ was so unified throughout every nation that there was no need for a secular United Nations? What if the nations were already united—through Christ? Okay, what if such efforts aren’t Biblical. What if we aren’t supposed to bring religion into hospitals, businesses, government, and aid endeavors? Or, what if we are only supposed to help those relief organizations which are Christian? What if we’re not allowed to support non-Christian relief organizations?

As ridiculous as that may sound, I have heard MANY conversations which testify that those claims are believed. If they aren’t outright said, they are implied and generally agreed with. In America we are for America, we are for the Western style of Christianity that we have. We are for singing America The Beautiful in church, because we all know Jesus loves America.
No. Not more or less than He loves Egypt, Iran, Afghanistan, China, North Korea. Yes, Jesus loves North Korea. (He even loves the French!) North Korea is even 1,000 miles closer to Bethlehem than Dallas is. China is 2,500 miles closer. America is by no means special to Jesus’ love. If you want to claim that our country was founded on Godly principles and that makes it better, fine. Go ahead. The nation of Israel was GOVERNED by God for years, so they must be the absolute best right? “Yeah but Israel turned their back on God and stuff...” Oh? And America hasn’t ever turned her back on God? News to me... A nation’s past matters, but not nearly as much as their present. And I’m not hating on America right now, I’m extremely grateful for America’s influence. Without America the world would be much worse off, but that does not make America a savior. It makes America a nation that the Savior uses now and then. We must get rid of this idea that America and the American way will save the world, she won’t. Only Jesus can do that.

Please, I BEG of Christians! Go. Don’t just talk, DO. We are called to make disciples, not give hand-outs. Hand-outs feed for a day, disciples feed for eternity. And if you don’t think it’s our business to help both Christian and non-Christian organizations, I point you to Galatians 6:10-
“Therefore, as we have opportunity, we must work for the good of all, especially for those who belong to the household of faith.”
Notice how it says we must work for the good of ALL? Not “all Christians”, not “all Americans”, not “all the people we like and all the orphans who look cute enough for us to give them money so they won’t starve.” ALL! EVERYONE! Yes, especially to those belonging to our household of faith. I would get on my hands and knees and beg people to support more missionaries. We tithe like we are doing God a favor, we put our money in the offering plate like we’re placing an order. “Long life, more money, and everything to go my way. I’ll give you another payment next week if you deliver the goods, ok?”

We have a lot of nerve talking to the Creator of the universe like we do in America. We have spunk to call ourselves Christians, mini-Christs, in a land where we style ourselves after the latest fad and the sexiest actor/actress we know of. The day we as Christians follow Galatians 6:10, I will weep. Because that sight will be so beautiful, so powerful, and so glorifying to our Abba. When we live for the spirit and not the flesh, realizing that we are not meant to chase the American dream but to chase God’s dream of His children giving up their personal comforts to help each other... that day will transform the world.

And yes, what I’m saying is you shouldn’t buy that 4^th flat screen TV and instead do something for the world He loves so.

Patience

Patience: “an ability or willingness to suppress restlessness or annoyance when confronted with delay.”

Patience is something that I like to joke about. If you’re my friend, then you’ve probably heard me quip, “patience is a virtue!” at any annoying or frustrating situation. Although it earns me a sarcastic comment or glare from those dear people, there’s another reason I say it, (more than just to annoy and be that person), and that is to remind myself to be patient. I used to have a huge issue with patience and I couldn’t stand waiting for anything: I wanted it here and I wanted it now. I say “used to have” because I like to think that it is something God has been working on in me and I am improving. For instance...

While we were in Milan (a lot happened in Milan), we did a children’s evening program in a local park. We had puppets, face painting, crafts, etc. It was a lot of fun and it was incredible to be able to minister to all the random parents who were happily surprised to see us! It was a week long program. Every day before we went out, we would gather together to pray and sometimes worship before we went out and tried to share Jesus with those beautiful people. Our last day doing this ministry, we were sitting in a prayer circle when I was distracted and contemplating what on earth would be my next step. As I sat there it was like this email from God popped into my head! I sat up a little straighter and tried to focus on it but all I could see was the subject (“I love you”) the first line (“Dear Grace,”) and the signature (“Love, Abba”). So I sat there, a bit impatient and wanting to see the rest of this decently long email from my Abba. And nothing came... I waited and finally told God, “look! I really need to know what’s in this email because it’s clearly about me and I deserve to know and now I’m curious and You can’t do that to me!” And then a bit of the second line cleared, “When you get back...” And that was it. That was all I got. It was like God was chuckling at me and waiting for me to get the light bulb moment. I did after that second line cleared a little and I suddenly knew that God was talking about Texas, when I got back to Texas after DTS. And then I understood a little bit more, He was asking me to stay in Texas for a little while longer after I got back.

Now, as much as I love Texas and have been working to get back to it since I left when I was 8, I dreaded staying in Texas. I was telling one of my leaders just a few days before how much I really did NOT want to stay in Texas and how I wanted to go and do for Christ after DTS. But seeing that email, my heart started racing and at the same time this big peace came over me about my post-DTS life. I knew I was supposed to trust Him and have patience for however long He called me to stay in Texas. While this was still going through my mind, we transitioned into a time of worship. I got up to walk around and ended up sitting on the ground in front of a painting in the church titled: “Patience.” It was a sloping block that was meant to appear to start before the painting and end after, you couldn’t see the beginning or the end of it but you had a feeling it was incredibly long. Yet all you got to see was this one section of it. And it was like God whispered that to my heart: “Patience, Beloved... patience.”

I didn’t know what to say so I just sat there worshipping and telling my Abba that I would trust Him and do whatever He asked me to do, even if that meant staying in Texas.

Fast forward to now, I have been in Texas for over a month and I am growing almost as much as I did on DTS! I miss my team; our love, familiarity, the safety of knowing we’re in this together. And the basic atmosphere that is a Discipleship Training School, it’s hard to describe. Those people become closer than your family, you walk through every lesson together, you weep together and rejoice together. And so it ‘s a little hard and sad to be going through so many amazing lessons without those beautiful people just down the hall or in the bed next to me. I would happily jump on a plane and return to San Francisco for another 6 months with them! But, there’s also a new strength and a new passion that I’m discovering within myself. After the scheduled classes, the time set aside for worship, intercession, and Bible study by our staff, I am suddenly given back all my time and have the responsibility to do those things myself. At first, I was at a loss and didn’t know what to do with myself. I floundered, I struggled, and I didn’t know how to have a singular Bible study or worship session. Where was my community, my family?

Yesterday I spent a beautiful hour with my new community, my college group at my church. And as I drove home, it was like there was this dialogue in my head:

God: Remember when I told you to be patient when you came back to Texas?
Me: Oh yeah, that was in Milan. That was nice of you!
God: Yes, but this is what I meant.
Me: Huh? Oh! You mean I’ve finished and now I can go on my School of Worship sooner?!
God: ...No. I meant, there are things for you to learn here and to do here. And you’re starting to do them.

And it dawned on me. I have the extreme privilege of being able to volunteer at my church, to make myself completely available to any events or ministries. I get to serve my rather large community that makes up my home church! And sometimes, I even get to share with them. I was asked this morning to be the 9^th grade girls’ leader in my youth group for the semester. I was still sleeping when the text came in, but I came awake when I saw that. At first I wanted to be scared, ha! Me? Be a small group leader? That’s funny... But then a really big peace came over me. And I found myself texting back that it would be awesome. And God again whispered to my heart, “Things for you to learn and do here Daughter...”

And I could only stand in awe of Him. Honestly, I don’t know why of all people I am ever asked to help with events, teach a lesson, or become a small group leader. I don’t know how I got the reputation I apparently have. But I do know that I am incredibly grateful for the opportunity and support my church gives me. Even when it feels like I could get lost in the crowd, there’s always something that happens that reminds me God has a purpose for this stage of my life. This time of patience.


"For I know the plans I have for you," says the Lord. "They are plans for good and not for disaster, to give you a future and a hope." -Jeremiah 29:11

A Changing Reality

Getting is not living. What is living?

Living, life, live: whatever form you take it in this existence we have is labeled. It’s stereotyped. While I enjoy stereotypes and continually will make references that are both stereotypical and ridiculous, there is one thing I enjoy more than stereotypes. And that is breaking them! I’ve done it since a small child. I’m a girl? I’ll like princesses and dolls? Watch me play with action figures and geek out about Star Wars! I’m a missionary kid? I must wear long skirts and look like I’m from a century ago? Watch me cut my hair into a Mohawk J

The point is, I don’t like being caged by what is expected. And that’s not because what is expected is bad but because I want more. I don’t want to just reach people who look a certain way, I want to reach everyone! I don’t want to be limited by cultural norms, I want to be all that I can possibly be! I want to not just fly but soar. I want to not just get by but excel. My determination is only tampered by my physical handicap and my monetary deficiency. But that doesn’t stop my mind from racing faster and faster, imagining more and more.

Yet sometimes there is a relapse. Sometimes there is a day when all those hopes meet reality and my soaring mind notices it is not actually moving. That day for me was yesterday. Last week was stressful and challenging but Friday, Saturday and Sunday Jesus did an amazing work and completely rejuvenated me. It was remarkable! Without slowing down in the slightest, I suddenly found new strength and a new thrill for life. I was riding high on this wave of enthusiasm when I came face-to-face with an unbalanced equation (humor me here, I am a geek). The imbalance was simple, for 4 years there had been this person transitioning inside of me. And I had a lot of memories of that person, memories that make me cringe and want to erase those years. And for the last year (accelerating on my DTS), a new Person was transforming that old person. In fact, you could say that 1 year replaced entirely those 4 years.

4 years changed by 1 year. The way Jesus works, 1 > 4 and 1 – 4 = +1. But the way math (and the human brain) works is 1 < 4 and 1 – 4 = -3. And yesterday I wasn’t thinking the Jesus way, I was thinking the me way. And all I could see was that big -3. And that big -3 and me had a showdown, very John Wayne and very dramatic. And the -3 ends up reducing my resolve and convincing me that when that rooster crows, I will fail (Matthew 26:34). And that failure will be permanent.

So there I was, at work on Sunday, just mulling over how much I will fail and how that will effectively end all my grand plans. And then, I’m asked to go pick up dinner at a restaurant. So I get in my car and my iPod starts on the same album that I listened to on the way to church. As I absentmindedly sing along,  (still lost in my thoughts), words coming out of my own mouth speak to my heart. “There are a million scars for every mistake, but we are not chained to the secrets that we’ve made.” I stopped dead when I sang that. My thoughts stopped, my mind stopped, and my voice stopped. The only thing that changed was my heart. I was silent and let those words fall over me, that -3 looking a little bit smaller. Then the next song came on, “If this waiting lasts forever, I’m afraid I might let go... Will there be a victory? Will you sing it over me now? ... I need a reason to sing, I need to know that You’re still holding the whole world in Your hands. I need a reason to sing.” And my heart couldn’t help but echo those words; this time beseeching God to answer me as I stared with dismay at that -3 still looming in front of me.

Finally the last song of my ride came on, “This is a call to all the dead and disappointed, the ones who feel like they are done. This is a word to all the ones who feel forgotten, that you are not.” And the rest of my trip was spent relishing the speed of my Savior and how quickly He comes to my rescue! Before I went to bed, I decided to check Facebook once more (yeah I know, it’s just addicting sometimes!) and I saw a blog had been updated that I follow so I went to read it. The title was simple, The Strength You Need, and in it the guy spoke of the temptations he faces and how he could not resist them without Jesus. In his closing paragraph he speaks to those going through trials as well and says, “Give Him the things you’re facing and in return, you’ll be given the strength it takes to not only survive but conquer.” (-Cory Copeland).

And that brought me back to that thought which I started this post with: what is living? When I read that paragraph in Cory’s post something stuck out to me, he was saying that God not only gives us the strength to get through things but to thrive and have victory over them. That is abundant life! (John 10:10) And that is something I will be pursuing until the day I die. Sometimes that is a lonely pursuit. And with that thought I remind myself, “Sin is contagious and can be passed from one person to another, but holiness is something you have to get on your own. ... Confess every known sin and stop every questionable behavior.”

Now I don't know where that -3 is and I don't care. The fact is, my life has been transformed and my reality has been changed. So it doesn't matter what other people think when they look at me and see that -3, because I know it holds no power over me. There is only one person who holds something over me-- that person is Jesus and He's holding love, dreams, and strength.